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by Cilantro Che Guevara

SAGA #12

Yesterday, Apple banned a comic book they were supposed to sell on their digital apps because it featured “gay sex.” After I reviewed said controversial images, I determined that Apple was right to ban the comic — not for the gay sex, though, but for the life-size hamster goblin committing murder with an egg beater. There’s also explosions, blood, and death.

You can still buy this comic, SAGA #12, on Image and Android apps or you can walk into a real-life store and pick it up, but I don’t know why you’d want to unless you’re OK with nightmares about half-human peacock animorph drag queens and whatnot. The one thing this series actually had going for it was the controversy surrounding the gay sex, and I would have never known this comic existed if I didn’t hear there was gay sex in it. But after I easily looked up the banned images online to see what all the fuss was about, even those didn’t deliver. I actually Googled “gay comic sex” just so I could look at better stuff… lol.

These naughty images Apple so proudly labels as “gay sex” in SAGA #12 are actually two “postage stamp sized” shit stains of what could actually be Tilda Swinton from the Oscars 2009 playing a harmonica. And even if you do define the images as two men giving each other sexual happiness, I can’t imagine how that would change a reader’s world view in any manner — negative or positive. On the off-chance this comic does do that, I’m pretty sure it will be because of the violence-ridden comic book-sized images (featuring the aforementioned rodent/demon) surrounding the postage stamp sized “gay sex.” Gay sex is *real* so why are the detectives at Apple not more offended by the imaginary, creepy stuff?

SAGA #12

SAGA #12

Maybe they banned the comic not because it had gay sex in it, but because the gay sex just seemed to be stuck into the comic for no fucking reason. I haven’t read the entire comic so I don’t know the context of the scene, but here is what I gathered from the two panes I read:

– The comic book version of MegaMan (who has turned into a drag queen with a peacock getup) found out his friend, a robot prince with a hipster Aryan messenger bag, needs a medic because he is somehow bleeding raspberry Kool-Aid.
– Demon psycho rat pops in to save the day with an egg beater to break what’s already broken and scare young children.
– MegaMan flies away.

I’m sorry, but a gay BJ fits into this how? Also why is it on a TV where the hipster robot’s head should be? Maybe the artists of this comic should have approached gay sex in a less subliminal, blink-you-miss-it way. They had no problem doing that in their other non-banned issues featuring straight sex (below), so why are they sticking these gay sex images into their work like disgruntled Disney animators?

SAGA #12

SAGA #12

SAGA #12

Maybe I’m looking into it too much. Or maybe not enough. Or maybe I should actually read SAGA #12 in its entirety first (lol). Anyway, if everybody is going to get all butthurt over Apple banning a comic for gay sex, at least make sure that comic has gay sex in it that’s worth getting butthurt over (wink)! Or you could just read Curbside by Robert Kirby:

Glitter Cocks

Follow me on Twitter here:@SillyCilantro


    The whole thing is Apple holds itself out as a beacon of tolerance and equality, but when it gets down to the nitty gritty it has the same double standard that permeates US society: lesbians with strap-ons okay a real dick not.

    BTW the robot prince is showing his real feelings as he dies. IOW he’s a homo-robo-prince.

    Billy
    April 20th, 2013 12:04 pm

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