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by Nick Swallow

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

Well, the Grabbys. What can I say, the weekend was a fucking blast and a half. Lunch with porn directors in the afternoon, being surrounded by either go-going or award-collecting porn stars in the evening, and then in the morning showering with whichever porn star I’d managed to con into my bed the night before.

I knew the weekend was off to a great start the moment I touched down in Chicago and was whisked from the airport straight to the first night’s event by the official cocky (and cute) chauffeur. In the middle of giving him his tip (i.e. a blowjob in the front after we’d parked up) Jake Jaxson started banging on the window of the car, shouting that there was no time for that — the party had started! So I wiped the precum off my lips, apologized for leaving the driver with blue balls, and ran into the club.

Jake was right — I didn’t want to miss this party! There were no less than EIGHT CockyBoys running around Hydrate Club in their underwear, snapping pics, pouring vodka straight from the bottle and into the mouths of anyone who got close enough, and pumping their asses on stage to the pounding beat. At one point, I got so hypnotized by Ricky Roman rubbing himself down with lube on stage that I almost missed Levi Karter doing a backflip. Wowzers! These boys are multi-talented.

The morning after I wiped off the glitter, grease, and semen from my luggage and got ready for the main event, The Grabby Awards ceremony! I arrived with the whole CockyBoys crew: Max Ryder, Jake Bass (as usual, being tailed by two or three fans!), Bravo Delta, Ricky Roman (looking adorably chic in a waistcoat and shirt), Jett Black, Levi Karter, JD Phoenix, Dillon Rossi, and Jake Jaxson with his two partners (Jake really doesn’t like to have cold feet at night, lol).

When we got into the building, it was chaos. Total chaos! Porn star royalty could be seen everywhere! Brent Corrigan, Trenton Ducati, Tommy Defendi, Christian and Austin Wilde (are they brothers?), the list could go on. In fact, it could go on so long that it would be as long as my arm! Or even my cock! Cameras were snapping, mr. Pam was filming everything for a NakedSword update, drag queen Sister Roma was interviewing the stars in front of a towering step-and-repeat, fans were gushing over their porn crushes… it was beautiful to behold.

Before long, we were all ushered into the main hall, seated, fed some middle-shelf spirits and politely told to shut the fuck up as the ceremony began. We were treated to a plethora of guest presenters, including our very own CockyBoys Max Ryder and Jake Bass, as well as shown exclusive videos from upcoming porn releases, Tommy Defendi getting his big old dick out when he won “hottest cock,” Brent Corrigan getting his perky little ass out as a distraction when he forgot what award he was presenting, and Jake Jaxson getting his big old heart out on stage by thanking the entire porn population for “putting themselves out there.” He knows it’s not easy for models, being constantly judged for how they look and what they do, and he got a few Awww’s when he put his heartfelt thanks out to the room.

As you may already know, CockyBoys took away four awards that night — Best Director for Jake Jaxson, Best Movie for Project GoGo Boy, Best Newcomer for Max Ryder, and the Steamworks Fan Favorite Movie Award for, once again, Project GoGo Boy. Get the hint yet? Project GoGo Boy is the must-see porn movie of the past 6 months! If you haven’t yet, WATCH IT NOW!

And then it was over. Yes, the ceremony may have been winding down, but the CockyBoys weren’t even remotely finished for the night. Our friends over at Naked Sword had just won four awards as well and they invited us all to their hotel after-party. It was a beautiful suite with just a hint of decadence as someone had erected a sling in the middle of the room (Ricky Roman ended up swinging around in it for quite some time). The bar was overflowing, people got drunk, porn stars did what porn stars do… and by that, of course, I mean that they mingled and sipped cocktails like the sophisticated professionals they are.

At one point, Austin Wilde came over to me and remarked that he hadn’t realized I had an accent — all this time he’d thought thePornpup was just another American blogger/hack. “Thanks,” I said. “I use my accent to my advantage in sexual situations.” Judging by how roughly he then fondled my ass, I could tell my English lilt had driven him wild…

I didn’t get to bed until 5 AM. The morning after was a little rough. But I dutifully rose at midday like a vampire from his coffin, and made my way to the Naked Sword Hangover Brunch at NorthEnd bar. The place was packed with people waiting to catch a glimpse of the stars. Sister Roma and Tim from Naked Sword took to the stage and quizzed a succession of, I have to say, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed porn actors. How were they so fresh when I looked like a week-old prune?

Alas, some secrets the stars never share. But Roma and Tim did get them to spill a few choice beans — like how Jake Bass is totally into the porn stud/thug Connor Cline. How Ricky Roman loved drilling Pierre Fitch until the Canadian couldn’t speak. How Max Ryder felt about taking so many loads from Bel Ami boys in his European orgy (he loved it).

The weekend then drew to an abrupt close. The Grabbys had been amazing amazing amazing, so much fun! I got to see how tongue in cheek the people behind the industry are and how a smile is their first reaction to pretty much everything (what I’m used to is only dick in cheek)! I got to meet a ton of stars I’d only ever jerked off to on screen, and I got to suck on a few of their dicks, too (but I’m naming no names). I’d recommend attending next years event, and I’ll definitely see you there!

From your guest blogger, thePornpup.

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013

CockyBoys at the Grabbys 2013


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